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Porn Stars: Angela Crystal, August Night
Produced by: Celestial Productions and Directed By Stoney Curtis
Full DVD Review: Fast Times At Deep Crack High #06
Tell a girl that you can make her a model and use her dreams to fuck her. It's textbook creeping right there. Pull off a two-for-one deal and now you're spittin' game. All you need is a camera around your neck and bedding these sluts is like shooting fish in a barrel. They might not be so quick to do hardcore anal like August and Angela, but you have to expect this to be "porned up" for entertainment value. I mean - who wants to see Tristan lay his rap on the chicks for an hour just to get a blowjob in the bathroom? A payoff like that would suck for him. For you though, it's an enormous improvement on your current situation.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Jan 18, 2010
Rebel Tags: Angela Crystal, August Night, Tristan Seagal, Celestial Productions, Directed By Stoney Curtis, Anal, Blonde, Brunette, Euro, Threesome
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Porn Stars: Brooke Banner
Produced by: Sin City Video and Directed By Francois Clousot
Full DVD Review: Ablaze
This story begins to jump around a lot at this point (definitely a sign that a porno tragedy is looming). St. Croix and Hannah are gaga over each other. Chris Cannon plays the stoic loner, because his girl can't handle the dangers of his job. (Yeah right, she probably got sick of his comic book butt chin.) Then there's Brooke Banner and Tristan Seagal. They're the ancillary attractive couple in the group. Not much on personality - neither of them are fit to carry a major role in this production. They're simply content to meet and fuck like normal people do. My prediction is that one of them dies imminently. Thankfully, that doesn't happen before Brooke is finished using Tristan's cock for all it's worth.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Dec 31, 2009
Rebel Tags: Brooke Banner, Tristan Seagal, Sin City Video, Directed By Francois Clousot, Brunette, Feature
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Porn Stars: Hannah Harper
Produced by: Sin City Video and Directed By Francois Clousot
Full DVD Review: Ablaze
Instead of a clever twist ending, Clousot leaves us with an unmitigated mess. You knew that Hannah Harper was going find love in the arms of a new man. Strip away all the firefighting bullshit and it's a story about a woman who loses her husband and needs to move on with her sex life. However, Tristan being the love interest is fucking absurd. He's the random dude that screwed Brooke before she goes lesbo. Tristan can barely hold a conversation in English, let alone be considered St. Croix's best friend. And what the hell happened to Cannon? Sonofabitch. If Hannah Harper weren't getting railed with passion right now, then I'd be mega-pissed about this whole movie.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Dec 31, 2009
Rebel Tags: Hannah Harper, Tristan Seagal, Sin City Video, Directed By Francois Clousot, Blonde, Euro, Feature, Outdoor
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Porn Stars: Alicia Rhodes
Produced by: Maximum Xposure and Directed By Mysterio
Full DVD Review: DP Wreckage #01
This patio pool area has seen its fair share of orgies and gangbangs. Then again, so has Alicia Rhodes. One cock never seems enough to satisfy her, even if it is Chris Charming's. That's why I'm sure she's happy to have Tristan Seagal in on the fun as well. Scoping Alicia out, it's easy to tell that her stature lends itself to whoring. Her body is soft without being fat, and there's a lot to grab a hold of in all the right places. Oh, did I mention that Alicia is filthy as hell? She has one of the dirtiest mouths that you're ever likely to find. Dirtier than her butthole I'd wager. How many girls can you say that about? I've never met a guy who would hesitate more to put his dick in a chick's mouth than in her asshole.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Dec 19, 2009
Rebel Tags: Alicia Rhodes, Chris Charming, Tristan Seagal, Maximum Xposure, Directed By Mysterio, Anal, ATM, Blonde, Double Penetration, Euro, Outdoor, Two On One
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Porn Stars: Vicky Vette
Produced by: Nectar Entertainment and Directed By Marty Zion
Full DVD Review: Metropolis
Vicky Vette, huh? She's not exactly the type that I would have expected to appear in a movie like this. However, the right amount of whore make-up can have an amazing effect. Dim lighting and plenty of stage cover take Vicky from cheating housewife to barroom bombshell. She certainly has the tits to qualify. They're her one feature that doesn't need much sprucing. Actually, any more "sprucing" and they'd be choking off her airway. Give Alex and Tristan credit for a solid tag team effort. You don't often see a DP unaccompanied by anal.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Dec 8, 2009
Rebel Tags: Vicky Vette, Alex Rox, Tristan Seagal, Nectar Entertainment, Directed By Marty Zion, Big Tits, Blonde, Double Penetration, Two On One
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Porn Stars: Crystal Ray, Jassie, Christie Lee
Produced by: Nectar Entertainment and Directed By Marty Zion
Full DVD Review: Illumination
Jassie, Crystal Ray and Christie Lee all emerge from the darkness like a triad of angry, horny nymphos. These chicks aren't fucking around. Well, technically, I suppose they are - but not until the guys show up. I'll call it an orgy, even though it doesn't qualify according to American Vice's strict definitions. There's no cross-contact between the couples. They're also paired off in their respective bays. So you get the benefits of multiple people having sex at the same time with the luxury of a clear view of the whores. It's like watching NASCAR on a short track. It's a nice effect, considering that most of the time the girls are hidden by a duo or trio of meathead dudes cramming cocks into whatever hole they can find. Dare I even say that this is more dignified? Nah, "synchronized" is the most appropriate description.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 17, 2009
Rebel Tags: Christie Lee, Crystal Ray, Jassie, Alex Rox, Anthony Hardwood, Tristan Seagal, Nectar Entertainment, Directed By Marty Zion, Blonde, Brunette, Group, Outdoor
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Porn Stars: Austin O'Riley
Produced by: Mayhem Productions and Directed By Johnny Glock
Full DVD Review: Foul Mouth Sluts #02
Sorry to say, but I'm not buying Austin's insincere dirty talk tease. It's the same old porn star bullshit, like calling a 1-900 number. If you ask me, she's better off just bending over and shutting the hell up. Success is all about knowing your strengths, and talking dirty is definitely not one of Austin's. She sure can work a mean vibrator though! Perhaps she is one of those whores who would rather let her actions do the talking. I can respect that. Unfortunately, Austin's actions are largely reliant upon Tristan's. She can have the greatest pussy in the world. But if her stud isn't able to handle it with any sort of consistency, then they both suffer. Lucky for Austin, Tristan is a pro who will eventually acclimatize himself. By the end of this scene, he's charging hard and deep on every stroke.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Mar 24, 2009
Rebel Tags: Austin O'Riley, Tristan Seagal, Mayhem Productions, Directed By Johnny Glock, Blonde, Piercing, Toys
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Porn Stars: Angela Crystal
Produced by: Extreme Associates and Directed By Derek Newblood
Full DVD Review: Extreme Teen #27
Extreme Teen has gone Euro! Nah, it's only this first scene, but still. This series has always been a beacon of low class domestic sluts. Angela is far from that. She barely speaks a word of English. BUT she does do anal, so I'll let it slide this one time. With the techno music blaring and Tristan enjoying the best that the Czech Republic has to offer (except for Monica Sweetheart, of course), I feel like I'm back in Twisted Tommy land. The only difference is that Tristan isn't wearing overalls, and there are no ponds, bridges or farm equipment for miles. There's just a bed, a blanket and Angela's ass. At the very least, she's well above the average hotness of the teens in this series. Maybe it's a sign of things to come.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Feb 11, 2009
Rebel Tags: Angela Crystal, Tristan Seagal, Extreme Associates, Directed By Derek Newblood, Anal, Blonde, Editor's Choice, Euro, Rimjob, Teen
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Porn Stars: Angela Crystal
Produced by: Mayhem Productions and Directed By Johnny Glock
Full DVD Review: Anal Assault #05
Angela studied "The Czech Whore Guide to American Porn" on her plane ride over. In fact, she memorized the most important line. "I come from Czech Republic, and I love to get fucked in my ass." That's practically Slut 101 for these chicks. No "A," no play - should be stamped right in their passports. It's the law of the land in porn valley . . .even for the male imports evidently. Tristan's initiation into this scene is a mouthful of ass-coated fingers, which he unwittingly licks clean until he realizes where they came from. Angela must be a fast reader. That slight of hand doesn't come until later chapters. Tristan returns the favor by pulling off the move that every guy reading this has tried to sneak in at some point: the finger/cock, pussy/anal DP. With the exception of maybe "The Shocker," there is no more sought after maneuver in the casual sexual realm. But I'd be willing to bet that most of you would run for the hills, if the recipient kicked things up like Angela does here. There would certainly be no kissing after a stunt like that!
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Dec 9, 2008
Rebel Tags: Angela Crystal, Tristan Seagal, Mayhem Productions, Directed By Johnny Glock, Anal, ATM, Blonde, Euro, Rimjob
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Porn Stars: Chloe Dior
Produced by: Sin City Video and Directed By Francois Clousot
Full DVD Review: Friends And Lovers
Is there anything better than late morning sex after a long night of drinking? Whether it's with a new girl or an old friend, sex is always better when you can actually remember it. That is where we find Tristan and Chloe. They wake up in the mood to get their day started the right way, which entails a lot of finger fucking and some sweat soaked sheets. It's definitely a hot scene. I'm surprised, because I generally have a slight distaste for Chloe Dior. For whatever reason, she doesn't irk me here and manages to end up looking very sexy the entire time. It's just hard, passionate sex that'll most likely get your wife or girlfriend feeling frisky.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Jun 10, 2008
Rebel Tags: Chloe Dior, Tristan Seagal, Sin City Video, Directed By Francois Clousot, Brunette, Feature