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Porn Stars: Summer Cummings, Elizabeth Starr
Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
HA HA HA HA HA!!!! You have got to be fucking kidding me! I've seen plenty of porn scenes with people in green body paint (a statement that I never thought I would honestly be able to say), but this totally takes things to the next level. It's almost like a slapstick, comedy porn routine or a hardcore episode of Teletubbies®. Despite the absurdity of it all, the costuming is relatively good. Do you know how hard it must have been to attach those cones to Elizabeth's tits or for the girls to airbrush their pubes in such far out patterns? Never mind the attention to detail on their purple nipples - this is some of the most thorough green body paint coverage that I've ever seen. So what if it's just a dildo sliding, Martian girl on Martian girl display. They certainly pulled out all the costume stops. For fuck sake, there's even a midget!!!
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Elizabeth Starr, Summer Cummings, Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Anal, Big Tits, Costumes, Editor's Choice, Feature, Hairy, Lesbian, Rimjob, Toys
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Porn Stars: Utah Sweet, Christine Allure
Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
Dude, I LOVE Benny Hill. At least, I did when I was a kid. Chicks running around in lingerie on basic cable television, are you fucking kidding me? That's an after school wet dream! The only problem I see here is that Elizabeth forgot she was supposed to be making a porn movie. The ratio of tit fucking to cheesy sexual jokes is completely out of whack. That's awesome news for me (who craves outrageous entertainment), but bad news for you, the porn seeking consumer. All the big boobs covered in green paint and douchey guys in various states of nerd-dom are better suited for a stag party than private porn consumption. Even with Christine and Utah providing another green on green dyke out, it's a far cry from anything arousingly sexy.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Christine Allure, Utah Sweet, Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Big Tits, Costumes, Feature, Lesbian
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Porn Stars: Elizabeth Starr
Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
With how much these two look into the camera, I feel like I'm watching the first season of "The Office." You know - the episode where Jim dresses up like a mad professor for Halloween and fucks Pam on the conference table in her purple Martian wig? Oh wait, that was just my fantasy. This scene brings it to life, as close as I'll ever get. Rod provides the first cock of the feature, fucking Elizabeth on her royal dentist chair/throne. "Queen Cones," as she's known for the duration of the movie, is all about the Earth dick. Rod literally fucks the cones right off her, which sounds much more grandiose than what does transpire.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Elizabeth Starr, Rod Long, Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Big Tits, Costumes, Feature
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Porn Stars: Summer Sinn
Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
It makes sense that Christian would be in a flick like this. He's not the most discriminating of porn studs. It's a shame. The dude looks like he'd make it as a mainstream draw either here or in the WWE, but he just can't stay away from the trannies. Once you've taken a she-dick up your ass, there's merely no going back. That's why you never hear stuff about Jenna or Mary or Hannah fucking guys like Chris Dano. It's such a double standard. Just because a guy likes shaving his head and enjoys deviant sexual scenarios doesn't make him a bad person. Or does it? You be the judge. If you had to fuck this guy, could you get past the mental image of him tittyfucking a big-breasted chick in green body paint and antennae? That seems like something that could potentially inhibit a woman's climax.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Summer Sinn, Christian, Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Big Tits, Costumes, Feature
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Porn Stars: Misty Knights
Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
Only a shot at "The Hedgehog" could adequately do justice to the zaniness of this movie. I mean - who better than Ron Jeremy to play the role of the "perfect big dick" in a flick with no credibility whatsoever? It's like a metaphor for his entire career. He's the epitome of a lazy American president. With his hairy back and fat gut fitting precisely over the crest of Misty's ass, it's reminiscent of Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky floundering about on the floor of the Oval Office. Even painted green with purple hair, Misty is still way hotter than that sea donkey. However, I imagine the timeframe is much the same. Misty and Ron don't even make it ten minutes before they're basking in the glow of his girth and Misty's remorse starts setting in. Now I feel remarkably similar having watched this thing until the bitter end.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Misty Knights, Ron Jeremy, Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Big Tits, Costumes, Feature
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Produced by: Starr Productions and Directed By Elizabeth Starr
This is what behind the scenes in a porn movie is all about. Get up close and personal with the real stupid, hilarious, motley crew of characters that are willing to perform such preposterous roles for a modest paycheck and the opportunity for orgasm.
Posted by: AmericanVice.com on Oct 8, 2008
Rebel Tags: Starr Productions, Directed By Elizabeth Starr, Behind The Scenes
